In honor of the self-congratulatory spirit of the Oscars this year, I'm writing myself a self-congratulatory post. I should really bet money on the Oscars! I only got Costumes and Documentary wrong. I am a powerhouse.

I'm totally posting this before they announce best picture. This was maybe the most boring Oscars ever. It was certainly the most masturbatory, what with this ridiculous theme of 'congratulations to us for congratulating ourselves for 80 years!' they have going on tonight.