This video legitimatizes the existence of reality television for me, most specifically 'The Hills,' where nothing ever happens and everyone is always white. I have newfound respect for James Franco and Mila Kunis now.



Now I can die happy.


For reference, the original clip they are parodying can be viewed here.

I may begin working on my SIP again. Such a statement requires fanfare.

Current length: 58 pages
# of pages left to write: 62

That means I am almost half-way done.

Also, I sort of feel like I'm back in Denmark now. Not because of anything truly 'Danish' going on, but rather the feeling that I'm not safe in my own home. It's frightening in that way that things that threaten your personal safety are frightening, but it also feels comfortably familiar, just without the chocolate milk. It also makes me want to smoke cigarettes.

An Open Letter to a Thief



Dear whoever tried to break into our house at roughly 4:30 am,

There are approximately five windows in every room (no panes). Our doors are mostly made of glass. I don't know what you were trying to accomplish with that bike/front porch bashing action against the screen door, but to break into our house, you probably would have done better if you had just broken the glass. Sure, we would have freaked out, locked ourselves in our rooms and called the police, but hey, we did that anyway.
Conclusion: You are more than marginally incompetent. Consider changing your chosen career.

Sincerely,
One of the frightened tenants